What Do I Do When I’m Triggered? (Unlearning Trauma Patterns)
One of the most intense challenges of being human is when we become highly emotionally activated.
You're existing in your life and suddenly, something happens to send your heart racing.
A sense of urgency floods your nervous system.
Perhaps it feels like heat coursing through you, or maybe it's icy and you feel tensed up and slowed down, or simply heavy, leaving you desiring sleep.
So many of us live at near-capacity of what our nervous systems can tolerate. This makes us feel as though we have a "hairpin" trigger—powerless to what could send us over the edge at any moment.
We live in anticipation: What if I lose it? What if I don't recover? What if people judge me or distance themselves?
The Language That Keeps Us Small
Here's what I've learned: to say that we have a trigger is using language that keeps us identified with a false sense of powerlessness.
When we perceive our "triggers" as things that dismantle us—that interrupt our peace and strength—we continue to identify ourselves as small and limited to reactivity.
This is not our truth.
Truly, life is a series of happenings, and we have free will and choice in how we respond to these events.
Any identifiers beyond that are ours to work with.
Remember, you are not your lived experience.
Your past does not define you and it does not determine the future.
Beyond the Ego's Fear
Despite years of therapy, EMDR, countless psychedelic journeys, and deep spiritual practice, I still have a human physiology that can become highly activated. I've done so much work, and I remain committed to what’s still ahead for me.
This is my sadhana—my daily devotion to improving my relationship with fear, which is really what the ego is.
Not arrogance, but fear itself.
The ego is not our truth.
It's merely who we think we are.
What we are is without definition—the closest I can put it into words is love.
A Different Way to Respond
When your heart is pounding and your nervous system perceives a threat, pause and ask: Is there something directly threatening my physical existence right now?
If yes, respond with the highest level of discernment available to you.
If no, connect with your breath.
Softly become aware of your body and feel how that energy wants to move through you.
If you can learn not to be so reactive with yourself, more freedom becomes available over time.
The Soul's Classroom
Remember: this human life is a classroom for the soul, offering us the opportunity to come into the love that we are—if we choose to shift our perception away from our previous identification of "self."
What still activates you?
What are you attached to that feels challenging to surrender?
Said another way: If I were not threatened by my sense of fear, how would I feel?
If I were not identified with powerlessness, what would become available to me?
Life is unlearning and letting go because we are always in flow with change, impermanence, and uncertainty whether we accept this or not.
It is when we resist our fear that we suffer unnecessarily.
It is possible to befriend our fear so that we can live more fully.
The process of befriending is perfectly imperfect.
Allow it to be more adventuresome each time, and you'll find yourself feeling lighter in its presence.
Presence and curiosity with our fear opens the relationship.
Where you take it from there is yours to explore.
Steady in the practice,
xoxo
Rachel
